You’re driving at night. Headlights guiding through the winding roads, illuminating your path. You notice your vision becoming obscured by an ominous fog. You are driving down a road that you have gone down hundreds of times to get back home. The fog thickens and you begin to worry as your headlights can no longer guide you. So, you slow down, begin to question if you actually know the way the road is supposed to go. Your feelings of anxiety and uneasiness strengthen, and your confidence diminishes. However, you keep driving. There is something within you that knows you will be alright, you just need to make it through this fog. You trust that feeling, turn on your high beam lights and continue your journey back home.
Our lives can mirror that journey through the fog when we encounter something new. We are going down that same road but at times, fog clouds our vision. We may forget our ability and skills to navigate through challenges and begin to doubt ourselves in the process. Somehow, we keep going and find ourselves on the other side of the fog. While you are experiencing a stressful time in your life, the end may not be in sight. You may lose hope of ever getting out of the rut. We tend to be our harshest critics and when the going gets tough, we buckle down on ourselves. We forget that we have survived through things before, that we can do it again.
That thing inside, that keeps us going through it all, that is our inner strength. We all have it. Trying to find it during the most challenging times in our lives is the difficult task. It is much easier to ignore it. To pretend that nothing is wrong, to continue to choose what is easy but may not be right for us. That strength may be only a whisper we hear every so often during these times and so, we let it go from our minds and continue on. Until that no longer works for us. We all get to that point (whether we admit it to ourselves or not). Where our solution has actually now become the problem. For many, this is something difficult to change because you have to try something different. I had a professor in graduate school tell me that whenever you are feeling stuck with a client, “DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!”. He was very wise in his advice and I think it applies to all aspects of anything occurring in life. When you recognize that your solution is now the problem, try something new.
You don’t have to believe it will work, just do it. See what happens. Will your thoughts change? Will your actions continue to change? Will your emotions? You may never know unless you put it into practice. But that is what is most terrifying to us all. The unknown. The possibility that it may not work. So, then what? That’s the chance we take in each decision we make in our lives. The outcome is unpredictable. Once you are able to accept that fact then fear no longer has power of you. You can begin to take the control back.
I challenge each of you to “do something different” if you ever begin to feel this way. It can be as simple as taking a bath instead of a shower at the end of a long work day. Try it out, see what happens. We are creatures of habit and I speak for myself here, do not enjoy rapid changes to my life or daily routine. It takes time for me to adjust to new experiences and transitions in my life. I can empathize with how difficult a task this may seem.
Getting back to that inner strength I mentioned earlier… We all have it inside of us. It helps to guide and lead us in whatever manner we believe it does. I challenge you to hear the whisper of it and allow it to grow. Give it the space inside you it needs to flourish. It does not have to remain soft and silent. Take the control back, your voice back. Tap into that strength and run with it.
It is tough for us to trust in ourselves and our abilities. To give credit where credit is due and realize how much we have to offer. By giving your inner strength more room, you can begin to do that. To trust in yourself and from there, the possibilities are limitless. This type of change does not happen overnight. We have set backs and days where we are just too exhausted and that is okay. It, just like with any new habit, takes time and practice. You have to work towards it daily, little by little. Over time, it becomes second-nature and you no longer have to intentionally alter your thinking. That will become your new coping mechanism when the going gets tough. Be patient and treat yourself with compassion. You deserve it.
Continue down that dark, foggy road. You know the way home, you always have. This time, fear will not entice you to slow down and question your knowledge. This time you will immediately turn on your high beam lights and remain on your path. This time, you will have faith and trust in yourself, something you weren’t too sure of before. Your inner strength is powerful and finally has the room it needs. The words it speaks are no longer whispers. The words are clear and concise, helping you navigate through the fog.